Paula's story... What is that saying? You can never go home again? Well I did and it was quite a shock to me.
It had only been 6 months since I had last seen my parents. My last visit had been during the
Christmas season, and the house was full of relatives and friends. Both mom and dad seemed
like themselves, very happy and ready to entertain. I did notice my dad "zoning" out a few times,
but I just chalked it up to holiday exhaustion.
In May my mother called me at work, and let me know that dad was just having a few tests done
but not to worry. So, I didn't. I mean I did worry a little, but usually my parents were very upfront
with me so if my mom said they were little tests I believed her. Mom called a week later, sounding
quite distressed, and asked if I could come home. This was not a good sign.
When I arrived, Mom was not herself at all. She was really stressed out and immediately I could
see why. My dad sat in his favorite chair, right by the fireplace in the study, but the man I saw
was not my dad. He had a distant gaze in his eyes, looked sullen and withdrawn, and didn't even
register a smile when I sat down in front of him. I tried to hold back my own tears, but it was
really difficult.
My mother stood in the doorway crying, and began to tell me about how dad's mental health started
to slide a few months back. He began forgetting things, slept at odds times of the day, and was
sometimes incontinent. She said that he would ramble on with these imaginary words, and sit for
hours staring off into space. The doctors told her he was in the advancing stages of dementia,
and suggested she put him in a home.
I knew I had to get them help, but had no idea where to begin. I couldn't leave my job and family
life I had established on the East coast. I had worked really hard to get into the position at my
current company, and my children were involved in their school and sports. But they were my
parents, and I needed to help them in any way I could.
I decided to call some of my local contacts to see if they knew of a way to get my parents the help
and support they needed, so that we could all rest easier. Luckily, an attorney that I knew told me
to call Sound Options, Inc. She said they helped manage her father's care, and difficult medical
situations, with professionalism and compassion.
I am so grateful that I connected with the professional care managers at Sound Options, Inc. Our
care manager helped us find an in-home caregiver, ordered medications for my dad, coordinated
with all the doctors who deal with both of my parents and found an elder law attorney to protect
their interest. Most of all, the care manager helps support my mom and provides me with honest
assessments regarding my dad and his health.
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